I'm going to say what I've been feeling.
The ones we leave behind when we go out to sea to find a better way. I've rollercoaster'd this year. From a cheap love, cut short by my emotionless taught way. I wasn't ready to invest my heart fully in something and actually feel it being returned. I was always about rescuing and ditching. I don't know a lot about the ways love. The movies teach you falseness and unrealistic unreachable heights. I have learned that the hard way. So a love snowman just melted before my eyes and I felt like the harsh hot lonely Sun. So I went out searching for someone who related. I met him like the shooting stars we watched at the beach the first night together. Even now, just friends. He holds my heart in his hand. And I can't or won't hide it anymore. The age where you decide a lot of things. Are you to young? Are you old enough? Where in this big world do you belong? West? East? Space? I need to figure these things out. But it never hurts to have someone there with a symmetric heart to help you see through them. This romantic fantasy has fallen back burner for me. I have my sights set on a different kind of life. I know I have been gone a little, friends and I'm sorry for that. But once this is successful and I can kick it back; you will all get it all made it up. I just know what I'm doing right now, I've never felt so full of life behind these machines, in front of business people sharing something I have dreamed about doing since I was 5. This year has been a train wreck when it comes to school as well. I could've taken the easy way out, been a teacher. Tried to do design or photography on the side. But I can't its fire burning inside my, and my soul needs to be ignited. So here I am, a little girl trying to take over a big city. Thank you to my support. And I can't wait to share this summer of sewing, sweating, bickering and endless cups of coffee with all of you. The only one who knows the secrets right now it my 4 walls is my room, and thank god they don't talk.
I Miss You Justin.
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