Ulterior colored backs of minds

Always expect the unexpected.. Usually the last thing you expect to happen ends up happening.. it's a part of life.. once they remove their mask, their true colors show.. everyone puts on an act.. they want to reel you in.. afraid that if you knew how they truly were all feelings would be lost. You can't build a relationship on lies and fake smiles, you need to build it with truth and honesty. they will take, take, take, until there is nothing left. Hurt you for their victory, and thrive on your fall. It is hard to find true people in this world. Most people are self destructive and only have a mind set for their own individual satisfaction. Living with ulterior motives. No matter how you feel or what you do, it will always be about them.. you need to stay clear of this people.. New York is full of them.

Face of mine

I'm not gonna fight it
We're both on the same side.

I believe in my friends tonight

Where to start. I feel extraverted lately. Like I am doing a good job of putting myself out into this crazy mayhem of a mixed up world. More time focusing on future and the whole idea of doing NOW for LATER. It's a hard concept to do. I've been working a lot, dancing. and I have come to conclusion I wish I was 13 years old or that it wouldn't be weird if I was best friends with a thirteen year old. My head is wrapped up in what I want to do and that is work for a fashion magazine. Fashion is a driving force behind anything I do. A feel good or a feel down. The compliments I strive for when I get dressed. The research on sales, far trips for good names, stalking European collections, spending hours thrifting through thrifts for a piece that was misplaced by someone who let the name slip by. I have so many clothes, that I melt when a friend says she needs an outfit, because dressing is a favorite. A personal shopper, or personal stylist would probably sound like a better fit. But layout and appearance is a speciality of mine. I like to take charge in situations. I like it when I have the final say and moving up is something I must do in any tiny work environment I join. Since I was 16 from associate to lead to manager. Dancer to lead. Teachers assistant to head teacher. So in a world where completion is harsh, it might lead me to not give up once I got as far as I feel I can go. It feels good to know what I want to do and when I tell people, the agreeing or glee in their eyes when I see they can see I can succeed.

So happy knowing!

cores among hearts of purple

Happy April.


the weather rules my mind.
take me places.
gives me motivations.
I am young
I want sun

Secret life

"Like you said, It seems like it's been forever since we've met. But it's been a short time. Your the one I can go to advice of all sorts. Your thebig sister I've always wanted. To know, that even far far away you try to make my day a good one. I couldn't thank you enough for everything you've down. I understand this may all still be weird and tough on you. Believe me, it's still new to me too. But it's one of the best things that has ever happened to me, meeting you. My big sister was out there. And now brought together, you're the best big sisssy. Loveee you lots. I hope everything works out for you out there too. You deserve it. The boys it's got to be tough, and even at FIFTEEN now, I'm always here for anything you need. I hope to see you soon. And I can't wait til were living somewhat close. Thank youu."   -- Reblogged from  Taylor Minarcin http://8456732.blogspot.com/  


You my dear, have made it all easier and I love calling you blood.







Happy Birthday Taylor Minarcin !

constantly trying to break your heart.

style is change. versatility. ability to switch. day to night. boy to girl. play to dance. fun to sun. it's all about the wearer not about what you wear I believe. this unique piece of clothing needs to take on a mind of it's own by the person who is wearing it. my school to date:

Eet

I'm falling into this thing, I think it's what people classify and turning into a woman, or a grown up. But i'm falling in love, this new kind of love that I think you work years to understand, discover or interpret.

I'm learning to love myself.

I'm accepting these flaws, this mind of racing slugs.. racing to a never showing finish line.
I'm loving the mistakes, the things I mess up on, because the understanding of messing up is new on it's own.
I'm discovering these talents, I never knew.
I'm realizing what I have done, through books of entries and piles of art work and shoes boxes of picture. That was me, that was experience.
I'm becoming less stubborn, and actually letting this thing we call learning from your past take a toll on me.
I'm feeling things I've never felt before.
I'm only listening to this voice. Through designing and saving money and booking things on my own, I'm feeling so independent. Living on my own is the next step.
I have done so many rights, and though my wrongs out weigh my right's.... i'm rewarding my rights. because they were so god damn right.
I'm moving my body, i'm dancing all the time. It's what I love to do, feel. I am so insatiable, with everything including my work, my grades, my money, my family, my situations... but dancing. I never wish for longer legs, stronger feel or more graceful movement. I am just satisfied.
I am letting him know, the truth about existing feelings and how I never stop thinking about us.
My family is moving in this straight line to forwardness. This past year though we took 18 steps back, we are actually redoing it... this time right. and together.
I am learning things about myself, I never knew.
I have fun alone. I enjoy my own company way to much, and way to often. I can laugh and myself, and occupy myself. My mind is so my own, and people think they need to be together all the time. I do enjoy peoples company, a lot more then often but once in a while. Once a day, I just like to think and not speak. Teach and be taught. all together.
I am fearless. I walk into these new situation where I am found so vulnerable... but yet so strong. because I have made it that way.



fearless.